As the blog so blatantly reveals, my boredom and resistance to domestic life started as the core of my discontent with Memphis. But, this alone is not a sufficient reason to run away from Memphis. After all, I could, with time and sufficient beating, get used to the heat, and, maybe, after several years could develop friendships and activities to engage me. Or, I could go crazy, but we won't go there. John reasoned that a move must be based on going toward, not running away from a situation. I agreed by shaking my head. He threatened to put a gag in my mouth if I didn't lower my voice.
Our house in Memphis, as Goldilocks might say, is "just right" now that we've finished the renovations, small repairs, and painting. But, homes are more than places to stash stuff and sleep, and this house is only that, not a center for our social lives. Although the fireplace in the bedroom comes close to Nirvana on cold nights.
From a work perspective, John likes his work well enough and it's easy for him, but the promised international travel has turned out to be Ottawa, Canada, not Europe, Asia and South America as was proffered. That means a major reason for me not working and for John coming out of retirement - world travel - has vanished. The fine print in his relocation contract dictates that he must work until July 1. After that, he's free to say "good-by" and without a substantial bonus, raise and/or promotion that might make him reluctant to leave, he'll go as soon as he can. A flat year is projected so good times at work are not expected. Most of all, he misses cooking. He regularly reads his cookbooks and muses at what he could conjure up if he had the time.
I'm adjusting to the writing life, and I am pleased not to be traveling for work; but as a gregarious "A" type, I miss the creative interaction of other like-minded and challenging people. My domestic chores are tedious. Cooking makes me yawn. My work with a non-profit is free consulting with cranky clients. The writing progresses and "the book" will be completed before spring when it's time for the excruciating pain of the publisher hunt. What then?
The dogs, when asked if they wanted to stay in Memphis, had no firm opinion. Fred yawned and Joe-Joe rolled over for a scratch on the tummy. They're willing to move anywhere as long as they get two squares and three walks a day and a cozy chair or couch to sleep on at night.
We added it all up and formulated our decision to get ourselves replanted before the end of the year. We immediately called a local realtor recommended by our ex-realtor Judith and put the house up for sale. It could take several months to a year to sell.
We thought about where we'd been happiest. Although living in Baltimore with our fun neighbors was exceptional, we chose Arlington, VA, specifically Crystal City. John and Fred took a pass on they're once daily chase after Baltimore's fat alley rats and drugged hoodlums. And, I don't ever want to do battle with plaster dust of 100 year old houses again. Crystal City's location above the metro, stores and grocery, closeness to DC theatres and museums, proximity to the Mt. Vernon bike trail, and Arlington's stellar reputation for decent city government swayed us. After looking at apartments and condos, we chose to rent rather than buy even with depressed prices and a large selection currently available. We found the perfect spot to rent when the time comes-- Crystal House -- 1800 sq feet, luxury building and dog friendly, so the boys will be with us and happy. We'll be there a year, maybe two, then make a purchase decision.
Before we rent that apartment, I must once again become gainfully employed. With a job in hand I will establish an Arlington beach head. John will follow when the Memphis abode sells and he's done working. Then, we'll move into the big apartment. To that end, I'm interviewing as I write. With the help of my friends Susan and Jon, I may have a job by spring. When that happens, my friend J, the dogs and I will drive back to Arlington where I'll rent a furnished studio or one bedroom on a short term lease. We'll save our nickels and get reacquainted with the area until John can join us. Until then he'll fly in a couple of times a month to visit the beach head.
What did we learn from our Memphis experience? First, we did not make a bad decision in coming to Memphis. It's been an interesting cultural adventure into the guts of the country. John fulfilled his dream to work in private industry. We made the mistake of assuming we'd love it, not just be able to tolerate it. And, with that, comes our second mistake -- we bought a house in a market where home sales move at a snail's pace. We didn't test the waters first; we dove in head first. How typically us! Silly us! With our plan defined, John untied me.
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